An open letter to fucked up women everywhere.
Dear ladies. Nestor here.
It seems as though we have had some problems in the past that I’d like to clear up before we can move on. You see, I love women very much. You are soft, cuddly, sweet, warm, friendly, sociable, funny, amusing, whimsical and altogether delightful creatures. I delight in enjoying the female figure with all five of my senses. I love the way you look, the way you sound, the way you smell, the way you taste, and the way you feel.
However, there are quite a few of you out there that are just straight up fucked in the head!
Here’s my open letter to those women who may be fucked in the head, or sitting on the fence, wondering whether it’s okay to be fucked in the head or walk the path of the enlightened adult.
Dear women,
Some tips:
1. Your chaotic personal life is none of my business. (By this I mean getting into fights, arguments, drama, and general asshattery)
2. Your traumatic past is none of my business. (It’s none of my business, I can do nothing about it, and all you’re doing is making me feel like shit.)
3. Your past relationships. (None of my business. I don’t have a want or a need to know, especially if it didn’t work out. Pssst. If you’re with me, your past relationship didn’t work out. just, you know, FYI.)
4. Your problems with people I know. (None of my business. If you have a problem with a particular associate, friend, colleague, co-worker, whatever, please take it to them. I am not a middle-man, nor am I a dumping ground for your problems.)
5. Your problems with people I don’t know. (None of my business. See above.)
If you cannot get through your day without telling me anything from any of those categories, then I’d rather you simply did not talk to me at all. So just, you know, internalize that list. Think of it like a game. the rules are simple:
1. You want to talk to Nestor.
2. Pick a topic.
3. Does it fall in the above five categories? If yes, see #4 in this list. If No, see #5
4. BAD END. Don’t talk to me! In fact, take 24 hours as penalty and try again tomorrow!
5. TRUE END! You’ve Won! Your reward is to talk to Nestor and have him talk to you! Be entertained!